The United States, in all its MSPaint Glory

        This is how I envision the United States of America. Many people, such as people who weren't raised in California, see this as strange.  They drone on and on about learning simple geography in the fourth grade and how "basic" geography is.  Well, these people have zero understanding of the California education system.  Some would say that a Californian's education is inferior; I, however, beg to differ (at least when it comes to geography).  Indeed, I think that the California school systems teach us all about the place that really matters the most in the world: California.
        The fact is, that in California, the only other state we ever think about is Nevada; Nevada wouldn't be even a passing thought if it wasn't for all the gambling and legal prostitution. Throw out Nevada, though and we're clueless; the reason we don't think about other places is they don't have a single thing to offer us.  Californians don't need to go on vacation to other states.  Everything we want is here: California has the best beaches, the best mountains the best pollution, the best basketball team (well, usually...off year for the Lakers this year, bah.), Disneyland, Knotts, Sea World, even wack ass Magic Mountain (don't get me started on Magic Mountain)-so can you really blame us Californians for not acknowledging the existence of your meaningless state?
        You might notice that I have states other than California and Nevada on my map.   I keep the fact that I know other states exist sort of hush-hush.  Unfortunately I have a bad habit of reading and learning which has burdened me with the knowledge of other states.  The fact that I contain such blasphemous knowledge is somewhat dangerous.  I could be found a heretic and find myself expatriated to Mexico and forced to live out the rest of my life constructing piņatas that vaguely resemble Mickey Mouse (if you are retarded or very drunk or high).  The only reason I even dare acknowledge all thirty states is because I am safely within the borders of Arizona.
        And, really-do we need thirty states in US?  No, of course not.  Us Californians have it right.  It is for that reason that I propose a new and improved United States of America that will more honestly reflect the views of the best people in the United States-The Californians.

• California will be changed slightly; Hawaii will be ceded as it is the only other place in The United states that anyone would want to travel to; it will also be the capital of the country.
• Nevada's will be rewarded for its  legal hooker/gambling ways with new land.
• New York will retain its name throughout the world; however, internally we will refer to it as "Terrorist Target Land."
• The rest of The United States shall become Arizona; although barren and poiintless as anywhere else non Cal in the country, AZ will be rewarded for its non-participation in the atrocity known as Daylight's Saving Time (which will be outlawed).