Updated October 5th
Daylight Saving Time: Evil
LIKE HITLER
There are some things on this earth that are horribly
atrocious. Things like rape, molestation and racism are horribly
evil. Or at least that's what people say; I don't want to take a very
strong opinion on that whole "evil" stance because I'm sure in this
politically correct environment we live in, the pro-rape leauge would sue my ass
for everything I'm worth. Although I'm not worth much, come to think of
it. "Everything I'm worth" would probably only buy the pro-rape
leauge a few boxes of condoms and a couple sets of latex gloves. Anyway, I
digress. There is one thing on this planet that is clearly evil:
Daylight Saving Time.
Daylight Saving Time was created by that nutjob Benjamin Franklin. I'd
always stuck up for that fool in the past. His love of electricity and the
fine princess always were admirable to me. Perhaps though, all that
intense sexual activity drove him crazy. Or maybe it was that talking
mouse? I remember seeing that in a Disney movie: that mouse was pretty
annoying: it'd drive anyone crazy. .Also in his defense, he thought the
idea up while in France. Of course the French loved it as did the
British.
Now I'd never want to perpetuate any stereotypes or paint any nation with a broad-brush; but, the
unarguable fact is that the British are lazy. Not that I really know any
British people. Except like a chick who was hot. She was lazy
though! There. Point proved. Anyway, I digress: as early as
1916, the British
pushed "Summertime" laws through parliament. They didn't want to go through
the trouble of getting up one hour earlier in the morning. Of course they
were too stupid to realize that they STILL were getting up an hour earlier and
the only thing that was different was the clock.
Whereas British people are lazy, Americans, for the most part, are stupid. So
it's not a surprise that something as idiotic as Daylight Saving Time was soon
adopted in the states. In 1966 Congress, likely drunk or high off all the
new hallucinogenics, passed The Uniform Time Act. Americans,
Stupid Americans love Daylight Saving Time. The U.S. Department of
Transportation conducted a poll in which Americans said, "there is more
light in the evenings / can do more in the evenings." This obsession
with daytime is typical of Americans.
Everywhere you go people are always talking about the day. "What did
you do today?" "How was your day?" These
questions are incessant. I really don't understand why, either.
Daytime sucks! It's crowded. It's hot. TV is filled with
crappy soap operas, crappy sitcoms and crappy news programs. The ironic
thing is, that as much as people talk about how great the day is, their actions
speak differently.
Most parties are held at night. People work in the day; I figure they work
in the day because they figure they might as well get it done while things are
crappy. Most parties are held at night. Most quality TV programming
(I realize that's an oxy-moron) comes at night. Sex is traditionally held
at night. Why do you think people have it on beds instead of in the front
lawn? Hmm. Well maybe daytime could have SOME positive
features? Hmm, no.. As evidenced on this site, most people are ugly
and I wouldn't want to watch them have sex.
Daylight Saving Time is evil incarnate. I urge you people to follow it no
longer. Next time it comes around, ignore it. Who gives a fuck if
you miss work, get fired and lose your house and end up living under a
bridge? Not me! I live in AZ right now so I don't have to follow
this Daylight Saving Time crap! Besides, you probably incompetent and
would likely lose your job anyway. So it's really not my problem, right?